Thursday, January 25th

This is the first post of what promises to be a rather interesting documentation of my life in Inglewood, California. Yes, I live in the ghetto. Yes, I am white. No, it isn't always easy....but it usually is pretty amusing. Anyways, as if that weren't enough, I live with some family friends (I call them my aunt and uncle, even though they really aren't)...and I'm pretty sure the wife is psychotic. She's a falling-down drunk, and she manages to hurt herself as a result of over-indulging in some E&J at least every couple of months (but she's drunk every day). This was my friend's idea...and I must admit that it's brilliant. Anyways, I'm not going to disclose any names, and if I feel the need to use a name, it's going to be changed and will have an asterisk next to it. So, I'll start with what happened this morning!

It was 2am and I was sound asleep. Out of nowhere, my aunt bursts into my bedroom and exclaims, "I'm shaving my head! I'm not even kidding - I'm dead serious! I'm shaving my head right now!"

Orly?

To be honest, I didn't care. I mean, I've been living with this kind of madness for over a year now, and it takes a lot to shock me. Once my heart stopped racing from being woken up by somebody bursting into my room and yelling, I fell back asleep. All the while, I could hear the hair clippers buzzing in the bathroom.

When I woke up this morning, my aunt was passed out on the sofa, wearing a baseball cap. I would have thought she chickened out if it weren't for the fact that the bathroom wastebasket is full of her hair.